Syndrome
by MAD H a t t e r Smile
Summary: [AU ShoJudai Yaoi] Sho is a patient at an Insane Asylum. Just how does he feel about a certain doctor? [Mainly just my rambling] [Oneshot?]


Discl**a**imer: Bel**i**eve it or n**o**t, I d**o**n't **o**wn Yu Gi Oh GX. Seri**o**usly

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S**y**ndr**o**me

By:

Al**i**ce

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**I picked you out**

**Of a crowd**

**And talked to you**

**Said, "I like your shoes"**

**You said, "Thanks, can I follow you?"**

**H**ow sad. How, meaningless, how pathetic. He would sit there, within this white room, as the walls would glare back. As the floor would open up, and would devour his soul, and leave his screams to stifle in the stagnant air. How his cries would fall flat at the doorknob, as he basked in the moonshine flooding from his window. Sleepless, sleepless nights.. He would stare, count the cracks on the walls which they so heatedly carp on and on about, as he counted the rings beneath his eyes. Those gray, dead eyes. How they were laced with grotesque threads. The veil over those eyes, the pain they masked. No one. Don't let anyone see his eyes.

And these complaining walls and the throbbing floor, how surreal they were. A painting. The brushes, they stroked such light shades along the dark tones. Like smiles lacking joy—robotic. The machine within the man. He colours, like a key, to unlock the heart. Switch the toy into something so clean. Smother the walls with your shrieks, with your cries, disaster, and wade into the heavy darkness again to coat the mind. Roll up your dead corpse in the sheets and run laughing out of the room. Let no one feel the pain, the disgust, which seeps through the skin deep at night.

But he was satisfied now. He had… Gee, crayons! He would laugh and giggle with the little papers he'd obtain. Yes, he'd manage to get this far. He could actual hold onto paper, without fear, without staring longingly at the sharp edges. No. No longer did he did he crave. Blood. His blood. Vermillion blooming flowers down his wrist, on the battle field, to flood permanently on the floor. But the floor detests his blood, it diseases him. It will blow it away, let it run down the cracks in the stones.

But everyone seems to notice his fleeing pain here. It's like they don't want it to go away. A glance in his eyes could diagnose the pain swirling in his gut like a virus. In his blood, veins. His vanity boundless, he has to get it out. Pain hurts, it won't go away. It doesn't leave, it stains his body. His arms—The colours, they blend, from a peach to a pale white. Incision, blanketed by his flesh. Depression. Passion—There was none. Insanity—There was none. Just free him from his fleshy prison.

**So it's up the stairs and out of view-  
No prying eyes  
I poured some wine  
I asked your name, you asked the time...  
Now it's two o'clock-  
the club is closed and we're up the block  
Your hands on me; pressing hard against your jeans  
Your tongue in my mouth, trying to keep the words from coming out  
You didn't care to know who else may have been you before**

**I want a lover I don't have to love.  
I want a girl who's too sad to give a fuck.  
Where is the kid with the chemicals?  
I thought he said to meet him here, but I'm not sure  
I got the money if you've got the time  
**

**You said, "It feels good."  
I said, "I'll give it a try."**

**Then my mind went dark-  
we both forgot where your car was parked  
Let's just take the train  
I'll meet up with the band in the morning**

**A**nd then there was Judai. Why? He could look into his eyes with such peace and content. Like a bird. Sho liked birds. Sho also found himself addicted to those eyes, flying high, as he dove into that bliss. Those dark, dark cauldrons. There was no pain there, there was nothing to catch him. His chains, they may have rattled, but that sound was empty. There was timeless silence in Dr. Judai's eyes. What was he saying? What were those soft lips pronouncing?

..Sho didn't really care.

Again, he wanted to fall into the pits of those eyes. Blissfully unaware. What? Stop! Stop shaking his shoulder, he's paying attention! He just wants to be in those eyes again, so let him fall. Fall, fall. You'd never think he'd be the one to try and die in the boy's bathroom stall. He felt like crying. Don't touch him! Don't! Get your filthy hands, you will infect him with your grim life. He is ecstasy, he is happy. Unaware of the outside, untainted. Let him fall into those gorgeous eyes again…

Who? Who is it, who holds him so close? He is warm.. His hideous heart, it pulses, life support. Gorgeous. Sho loved the way he was tied together with this feeling; such bloody threads. He holds him so close. Warmth, it emits from his body. He's regal; it's soft, yet stunning. Striking. A lucid smile spreads along his captor's lips, and Sho falls deeper into that warmth.

It is Judai.

He can feel his usual chipper mood, just by his body language. The walls told him, too. It's why the floor wasn't eating him. They couldn't take Judai, no. Judai was magical. He could keep away all the bad things. Him and his.. shell. Sho could feel his wings. He was gorgeous enough to be his angel. He just wanted to bask in Judai's splendor forever.

**Bad actors with bad habits  
Some sad singers they just play tragic  
and the phone's ringing and the van's leaving  
Let's just keep touching; let's just keep, keep singing... **

I want a lover I don't have to love  
I want a boy who's so drunk he doesn't talk  
And where's the kid with the chemicals  
I got a hunger and I can't seem to get full  
I need some meaning I can memorize  
The kind I have always seem to slip my mind

But you..  
But you...  
you write  
such pretty words  
But life's no storybook  
Love's an excuse to get hurt  
and to hurt

Do you like to hurt?  
I do, I do  
Then hurt me..

**W**hy? Why is he bleeding again? But.. The bandages. They were to keep his pain inside him. No, this can't happen now. The pain can be inhaled.. Dr. Judai.. He'll.. He'll be lost! Just as lost as Sho is! No! He desperately tried to get away, throwing his arms about. The walls.. They won't be quiet! Throw his blood along the walls, taint them, they will silence. They will simmer down at the coating.

**Then hurt me...  
**

The feeling.. The feeling, it fleets. What? Why does Dr. Judai take his hand? Sho smiles. He likes Dr. Judai's hand.. It's warm. It feels nice. More bandages? Oh.. Stitch him, please. How Sho wants a needle. The bandages, they're discolored. They're dirty. Smile for him, Judai. You make him feel nice. He doesn't have to look at those ugly, ugly wounds. Sho doesn't cry. Judai won't let him. The doctor smiles. Oh..

How beautiful his smile is. Sho loves it so much. Won't you hold him again? He likes it. He wants to feel secure, to feel wanted. And one glance in Dr. Judai's eyes could tell it all. He could show him love, and show him passion, and show him that the walls aren't always right.

He can show him what love is.

**Then hurt me.**


End file.
